"That night I wanted to tell Dave how much that hurt my feelings," Mendez said. "And then I realized that this is what Bill was doing. He was trying to create a wedge between us so Dave would think I was an a–hole."

Mendez said he stewed all night and the next morning, when he got to work, he was literally at Scheft's…

» 10/19/14 9:58pm Sunday 9:58pm

Huh. I haven't noticed any beef between you two (not that I've been looking for it), so I'm not sure what you mean. Have you just tried asking her to back off as nicely as you asked me to help? Zhandi and I run in the same Kinja circles, but we're not really "friends" so I don't really know if I'm the right person to… » 10/19/14 2:34pm Sunday 2:34pm

My heart goes out to you. It is difficult living with that duality of being a minority in a majority white world. "Am I [whatever] enough" (in my case, black) is a common feeling, same for feeling out of place in a majority white setting. » 10/19/14 8:51am Sunday 8:51am